+

Couple of things running around in my head.

First off, Evelin's pregnant. The First Response test had a good, strong line this morning.

Although the doctor cautioned us against attempting a natural pregnancy, we've been "not not" trying to get pregnant, and Evelin's cycle has been so messed up after the failed IVF cycle that, well, we didn't try to not get pregnant and it worked.

Of course, getting pregnant hasn't necessarily been our problem, which is where the worrying comes into my mind. This could be the one that works: Non-fragmented sperm could have met up with a good-quality egg with a properly firing mitotic spindle and, assuming the uterine lining is strong and a million other things, we could be on our way to a name change for this blog.

Or maybe not. That isn't what happened the first five times we got a positive home pregnancy test, and, while every time is a unique juncture of events, it's hard to not be worried.

And it sucks to be torn between joy and fear.

Evelin called the nurse to set up a blood test to start monitoring β-hCG levels, and we have to admit to the doctor that we ignored what he said.

Also, we went to the adoption informational seminar at the clinic last night. It would have been more help had it been a bit more structured. The three speakers (all of them social workers involved with adoption home studies and two of them were also adoptive parents) just introduced themselves and then opened up the floor to questions for the next two hours or so.

Those of us in the room were all in different stages of exploring adoption as an option, which didn't help, as those who had been thinking about it longer had much more specific questions that leapfrogged past the much more basic things others of us were wondering about.