Bad Marketing Poetry

Okay, so if I'm going to blog, I should blog. Even if it doesn't involve how cute Celeste is.

The marketing manager for the company where I work just left my office and the bad poetry below is mostly her fault. She had just finished some last-minute renewal wraps for two of our publications. When we talked about renewal wraps last week, I'd suggested she try a parody of "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handy, maybe from a television engineer with the soul of a poet. Or something equally bad (but funny).

Today, after describing the finished wraps to me, I reiterated the bad poetry idea, and she admitted that she did consider using a haiku or limerick on the wrap. Which lead to the following:

Renew to Ensure
[seven syllable magazine title here]
Your Job Enrichment

and

There once was a subscriber to [magazine title here, rhymes with "bar"]
Who stumbled late out of the bar
The subscription had lapsed
His forehead he slapped
When a review he missed of the latest in CD-R

I then offered up something a little more freeform:

Springtime.
Renewal.
Like fresh flowers
   and refreshing rain
[magazine title]
   Sign up again