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Tuesday, May 03, 2005

If I Were a ... 

I think blog meme things are supposed to help you when your stuck for something to blog about, but Anita stuck me with this a week ago and I've just been too tied up in 過労死 to do anything about it. So, without further ado ...
What follows is a list of different occupations. You must select at least five of them. You may add more if you like to your list before you pass it on (after you select five of the items as it was passed to you).
Of the five you selected, you are to finish each phrase with what you would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.

Here's that list:
  1. If I could be a scientist...

  2. If I could be a farmer...

  3. If I could be a musician...

  4. If I could be a doctor...

  5. If I could be a painter...

  6. If I could be a gardener...

  7. If I could be a missionary...

  8. If I could be a chef...

  9. If I could be an architect...

  10. If I could be a linguist...

  11. If I could be a psychologist...

  12. If I could be a librarian...

  13. If I could be an athlete...

  14. If I could be a lawyer...

  15. If I could be an innkeeper...

  16. If I could be a professor...

  17. If I could be a writer...

  18. If I could be a backup dancer...

  19. If I could be a llama-rider...

  20. If I could be a bonnie pirate...

  21. If I could be a midget stripper...

  22. If I could be a proctologist...

  23. If I could be a TV-Chat Show host...

  24. If I could be an actor...

  25. If I could be a judge...

  26. If I could be a Jedi...

  27. If I could be a mob boss...

  28. If I could be an Avon Lady...

  29. If I could be a store owner...
So anyway ...

If I could be an architect, I'd aim to design buildings with Bauhaus-level functionality but with a more naturalistic flair.

If I could be a librarian, I'd try to steer people toward more challenging fiction and a wide variety of history, science, and other books, instead of the latest summer beach books.

If I could be a gardener, I'd be able to do something about the ogräs that has replaced our lawn ...

If I could be an innkeeper, I'd want to have a comfortable place, not overly fluffy or busy, but warm and inviting with a nice great room with a fire for guests to relax around while enjoying a nice port and some cookies.

If I could be a store owner (my addition to the list), I'd be a green grocer with a neighborhood store that offered a variety of fresh local produce, artisan cheeses, a nice mix of staples and slightly exotic offerings with recipes available to help people figure out how to put it all together.

I'll let Anita be the one who analyzes what all this might say about me.... As for sticking others with the meme, I'll just leave it here for anyone who's interested in responding (just leave me a trackback or something), but I am curious what Enjanerd might have to say.

Blogger Commenting:
Hey, no fair putting me on the spot like that. ;)

I'll take another look at this tomorrow though... on first glance, I was thinking 9-12 were all my style, but I think I'm going to try the completely off the wall route.
 
Well, I didn't mean to put you on the spot, but I was pretty sure you'd have something interesting to say ...
 
If I could be a missionary, I'd be in the cookpot by now, with some nice carrots and a few other starchy root vegetables.

If I could be a Jedi, I'd have gone over the the Dark Side and would have my own leitmotif written by John Williams, and with a small orchestra to play it everywhere I went as a nice punctuation for my swirling black cape, and if they played a sour note, I'd crush their throats with the Force, just see if I don't!

If I could be a midget stripper, I'd have a big chip on my shoulder about how we prefer to be called "dwarves" these days, thank you very much, boom shikka boom.

If I could be a bonnie pirate, I'd pillage and plunder and rifle and loot; I'd kidnap and ravage and not give a hoot; I'd extort and pilfer and filch and sack and maraud and embezzle and even hijack, and then I'd drink up, me hearties, yo ho!

If I could be a sociologist, I'd travel the world studying the paintings on the backs of leather jackets.

That was fun! I wanna play again!
 
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